The experience of struggling with bipolar disorder has impacted every facet of my life from work to school, to relationships. It was difficult growing up in an environment that didn’t talk about mental health and supports available to manage the emotional distress I was experiencing especially during my lowest moments.
I struggled significantly with suicidal ideations, and it wasn’t until my third attempt to die by suicide that I felt a sense of support and discourse about my mental illness. However, it still wasn’t enough, and I continued to struggle through young adulthood. After my third attempt, I also started my journey of sobriety. Co-morbid substance use disorder exacerbated the level of distress I was experiencing, and it was until I was sober for some time that I decided to take my mental health into my own hands and advocate for appropriate care.
I couldn’t continue to live the way I was living, or a fourth attempt was inevitable. The pain was unbearable. I sought out counseling and medication-assisted treatment and found that with professional support I have managed my symptoms. I’d like to note that management is not a cure. I still struggle but have learned how to cope and care for myself when my symptoms start to impact my ability to function.
That being said, my life has taken to me to places I’ve never expected, and I have found hope. I have been able to grow in my career, graduate with a master’s degree in social work, get licensed, and start my Doctor of Social Work. I am not my diagnosis, and my diagnosis will not stop from achieving the life I want to live.
Danielle Bernas, LMSW is director of Refugee and Immigrant Center for Healing at Jewish Family Service of Buffalo & Erie County. She will share her story during the Anti-Stigma Coalition’s Facebook Live on March 19.
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